PDA vs PDI

I had to put my iPod on because I wasn't enjoying the sloppy sounds of making out accompanied by light moaning going on behind me...

Don't get me wrong! Hold my hand, give me a kiss, playfully swat me on the ass... (lol) I'm a fan of PDA, but when it becomes a Public Display of Intimacy it's just a leeeetle too much for me. Time and place people, time and place!

Today's Bobsy Twin sighting

They are wearing the same black boots, red chenille scarf, red sweater, mustard cross-body bag... And have brown raincoats on that aren't exactly the same. The only thing that's totally different are their pants and ages!

They boggle my mind.

Stephen King books are real!

At least that's how I feel as I'm being stared at by the icy-blue eyed old gypsy.  Everytime I look up, he's staring. I am just waiting for him to point his finger at me and start chanting "thinner!"

I want to lose weight, but not like this!

I can't take it!

On BART with a loud mouth pimp and a dude sweating and coughing up a lung. Not a banner day on the train!

The good news is I was busier than a seaport hooker so today flew by.

Self awareness day

Today is one of those days when I think about some of my traits and behaviors. Some are funny and some are not nice. I'm such a dichotomy. As real as I am, and as easy-going... Don't ever let me make you think I'm uncomplicated. I admit I am not.

Things about me I thought about on my drive to BART:

I have a fair amount of road rage, but would never hurt someone as a result. I cuss so much at other drivers I think I'll pop a vein.

I definitely believe I can do a lot of things better than most people, including driving. Damn, stupid scared people should not go out on that big scary road and fuck my day up!
I have a healthy disdain for most humans. When I find one I can respect, admire and trust I hang on to them. Dogs rule.

I was touched to the points of tears last night reading how my friend Rebekah went out of her way to save a little, sick and blind field mouse. She named him Ben. He passed away in the comfort of her compassionate hands. Who does this?! Not enough of us.

Finally, so you don't all think I'm a total hardass bitch, as I was walking down the escalator to the train I noticed the woman in front of me had her sweater on inside out. I tapped her shoulder and let her know. She said "I was in such a hurry, silly me!" and she thanked me profusely.

As much as I complain about people, I still have faith and hope and want to be kind to them.

it's been fairly quiet...

I don't have anything super exciting to share from BART these days. I did have a week off, and am just getting back in the thick of it.

I wonder though, are other people as curious and observant as I am? Who is a real people watcher? What kind of things do you notice?

Riding home from the Giants game late Wednesday night, my co-worker and friend Emily said "hey, that woman sitting across from us is writing about us." She did have a pen and small pad. So I said "oh, I got something for her ass!" and pulled out my bigger pad, and pen... and started writing. While staring at her. And talking to Emily. And wondering why hot dogs are so good. And why the Giants lost the game we were at, but kicked the Rockies asses the past two nights. And afraid my dogs ate my house out of sheer rage and loneliness. And dreaming about my new camera lens.

OH, did I mention we're getting a small but welcome bonus for being under budget this quarter? It's enough for lots of hot dogs!!!!!!!!!! (Prather Ranch Meats, organic... of course)

Groucho BART

In looking a guy with the best tic ever... His eyebrows raise up high every couple of seconds! Making me laugh but would annoy me beyond belief if they were my brows.

Releasing my inner farm girl

When I heard from my friend Linda that a good friends of hers that has a small pastured chicken ranch called Soul Food Farm, lost a big chunk of their farm (and income) due to an arson fire last week... I was upset. I told her if they needed my help that I was on vacation this week, and I'd do what I could. So Linda asked if I'd help her do egg deliveries for them today. Their egg laying hens and houses were intact, so that business still needed to be managed while they try and rebuild the other barns and tend to the 600 chicks per week they take in.

Linda picked me up at 8:15 today so we could get to the Vacaville farm by 9 and take off with a mini van full of fresh eggs (and I mean fresh, some were laid nearly in my hand!)... they were being delivered to 5 local Bay area businesses. When we arrived at the farm, I met Alexis, the very sweet, dedicated, and worried owner. The fire was really devastating to her and her family, and I could see it in her face. She was so thankful that we were helping, and just taking care of the deliveries for the day helped her tremendously. She was able to take care of her new chicks and other farm business instead of driving around all day delivering eggs.

Since things are off-track right now, the eggs weren't quite ready to load... so Linda and I jumped in and helped get them ready. We were labeling egg cartons, placing the sell by date stamps on the sides, running them through the egg washer, placing in cartons and loading in crates marked for each business. We had over 100 doz. eggs to deliver! While Alexis prepared the last 20 dozen (by hand washing in her kitchen!), Linda and I grabbed buckets and visited the hen houses to see about collecting more eggs. We loaded 2 buckets apiece. It was pretty cool. I only got pecked twice (Linda avoided reaching in, she's a little smarter than me). We spent about an hour and a half at the farm working.... then we loaded the van and were off!

Our first stop was Cafe Rouge. Easy peasy, if you don't count the only casualty of the day which was a dropped 6 pack of eggs oops. Next up was Magnani Poultry in Berkeley. Pretty easy, again. Then, we made a quick run up to Chez Panisse to drop off some dishes for Alexis. Next on our list was the great restaurant, Camino.

Then we hit the Bay Bridge for our last two stops. First up was the super amazing Bi-Rite market and creamery. What wonderful, caring people and what a fantastic local community market. They sell the greatest products! We treated ourselves to some ice cream. Linda had salted caramel and balsamic strawberry, and I had toasted coconut and coffee toffee. Mmmm! Moving on, we hit the streets of San Francisco bound for our last stop, Prather Ranch Meat Co. We unloaded the bulk of our eggs here, including 6 doz. Alexis had donated to Mission St. for a benefit.

We wrapped up our day here, and enjoyed lunch at one of my favorite places... Taylor's Refresher.

It was really refreshing to see the local support for Soul Food Farm, and how much people cared about Alexis and her farm. They're doing all kinds of fundraisers, raffles, etc... to chip in to help them rebuild.

Today was one of the best days I've had in some time. I felt very good about giving up my last vacation day to get filthy dirty, sweaty (and we all know how I feel about sweating lol), and worn out. Alexis and her family and her awesome farm deserve the best, and I hope they can pull through this setback. With everyone's help, I think they can.

For more information on Soul Food Farm and how you can donate to help rebuild, go to their site and read the blog...

I have a renewed appreciation for the small scale community farmers. Those out there with pastured animals raised humanely and cleanly work SO HARD to get what they have... wow. I will never ask again why eggs from a place like Soul Food are "so expensive" compared to factory farmed eggs again. I KNOW why, now. I was there. It's a ton of hard work done by just a couple of people and it's done by hand. Please, support them, support the businesses that buy their products, and support any small, quality farms.

I also want to give thanks to my own parents, who live on a small ranch and raise the meat I eat. My Dad has worked his butt off doing underground construction most of his life, and then he runs his ranch alongside that. He raises pigs, lamb, and beef. I have a freezer full of humane and free range meat thanks to him. He just dropped off a dozen fresh eggs from his hens for me yesterday... THANK YOU MOM AND DAD!

I admit...

I'm a bit frightened by religious zealots. Don't they end up being the serial killers, kidnappers and rapists on the news a little too often? They hide behind religion and say they were following direction from the Lord? Um, the Lord of Darkness?!

Current case in point, Jacey Lee Dugard's kidnapper. That whole situation is unfolding in to an unbelievable nightmare. Dude is a monster. One that loves him some Jeeeeesus. Does Jesus love him?

It's a banner day!

Sitting in front of the red jacket twins was enough to make my morning BART ride... Until he came along.

He is a dirty but cute little street urchin. Guess what he's doing on our car? Entertaining us by playing his bright red electric guitar! Yippee! On a jam packed tiny train car. I'm so thrilled that I'm blowing out my own eardrums by turning my iPod up *very* loud. Is that blood?!

People actually paid that fool. One older man told him this wasn't the venue for his talents. Amen, brother.

Silence... With the exception of Radiohead blasting through my earphones.

The Grand Champion!

...If there was a cursing contest, I'd win. If there was a quick comebacks and random insults award, it would be on my mantle.

My verbal road rage actually causes fits of laughter. At least I can laugh at myself!

Matchy, matchy!

Ok so there are two older Asian women sitting together wearing the exact same bright red quilted jacket. As if that's not kooky enough, they also sport the exact same tobacco colored cross-body purse. Oh, and I just checked. Yep, same shoes too. The pants are different, and I can't see the tops. No, they are not twins in the biological sense of the word...

I'm confounded. Was there a buy BOGO sale at Kohl's?

Stewie!

This guy just got on the train with a life sized Stewie doll. This pleases me. I now want a Stewie and Brian stuffie! Friday just got better.

Yet another underpants offense

This time, we're talking a good 6" of hot yellow Granny panty exposure. WTF!? Was she tryin' to be like the dudes who walk arounds pants saggin' and boxers on full display?

does anyone else enjoy Punk Rock Johnny Cash?

I have a secret crush on him. I can't bring myself to tip him... I'd feel like I was paying a prostitute since I crush on him.

He can sing!

Falling asleep...

... = nap jerking. Not cute and I laugh at people. I guess I have to laugh at myself today :(

I am going home to watch Stepbrothers and sleeeeeep. Long day wine tasting and having dinner tomorrow. Peace out!

When you're good, you're really good...

...but BART when you are bad, you're rotten! Thanks for making me 40 min late today.

Fairly boring car full of people. The makeup lady I've determined to be Russian is sitting right by me. Studying her. Nice skin for an old broad but her whole get up scares me. More makeup than a MAC counter, teased up red highlighted hair, bling bling and flashy yet cheap clothes. I'm guessing 55 but trying for 35.

panties, ladies... panties

Seen today. No less than 3 tragic undergarment mistakes within feet of each other.

Case #1: the Granny panties that the crotch seam came up so high you could clearly see it through her thin pants.

Advice: Get a fucking mirror and use it

Case #2: the top of her Spanx and the tag peeking over the waistband of her pants about 2"

Advice: points for the Spanx with dress pants, but... low rise may not be for you

Case #3: tight fitting dress pants devoured by ass crack. They were so far up her ass, how was she functioning?

Advice: buy your pants one size larger. Wear Spanx or boy shorts... ANYTHING to keep your entire ass crack from being filled with fabric.

Shudder. #1 advice... MIRROR.

Something About Stephanie

So I think this replacement iPod may in fact be a problem... will be hard to ear hustle on BART and have interesting blog stories. I'll have to listen with one ear phone in, one ear on the hustle.

Side note: thanks Stephers for pointing out there was some suspicious whitish substance in my hair today. Very "Something About Mary" ;)

If your ass is this big...

Ok, so I'm by no means a small chick. I'm a healthy size 16, and as my bf likes to put it... all T&A. That said, my booty still fits on one half of the BART seats, it still fits comfortably (ok, are plane seats EVER that comfortable?) on an airplane seat, and various other places.

Today, I was sat on. Literally. A Very Large Woman sat down next to me with an emphatic WHUMPH! Her ass was so big, part of her right leg was actually on mine. I was trapped! No where to go. At that point in time, getting up wasn't even an option... I started feeling claustrophobic and VERY uncomfortable.

Then I flashed back to a conversation one of my favorite dog/chat boards had about airlines requiring big people to pay for 2 seats if they could not fit comfortably in one. It was a pretty lively discussion. I am of the mind that you should have to buy two seats if you are that big, and make the person next to you squished. It's not fair to them.

So, I ask you fair readers... should this woman have stood up, or was it acceptable for her to sit on her seat mate?

I have interesting experiences on BART. Most are interesting in a not-so-good way.

Herbert from Family Guy was sitting by me!

Seriously... he didn't resemble him so much as he sounded like him. It was creeping me OUT.

My beloved co-worker Brian can imitate him perfectly. I need to record it. My skin is crawling right now!

Family Guy Herbert Song @ Yahoo! Video

Oh, no she dinnit!

Overheard on BART today: a woman on her nice cell phone talk about her 5 kids and how she is scamming welfare. She's got quite a little racket going, with the help of another person. Right now she's only making $3200 a month off that but if she wins her appeal (does this mean she was getting this much before?!), she'll be back in the 6K range.

What am I doing wrong!? Oh yeah. Working hard, having morals (damn them anyways), being honest, and not having kids.

not seen on BART, rather Kaiser

I'm staring at a girl in the orthopedics dept. that's in a leg cast, has crutches, and a 5" stiletto on her good foot!

YOU GO GIRL!

BRUSH YOUR everlovin' TEEF!

on BART: I wonder, do this many people have stank breath and just not know it? WHY do they always sit next to ME!?

It's either them, or the "I just smoked a pack-o-cigs" people. CLEAN it up folks, we're in close quarters have some respect.

N. Concord station agent jerk, I hate you!

My BART ticket wouldn't work so I handed it to the rude geriatric agent. He scowls and asks where I got it. Um, the mail where I always do? It was a brand new ticket with over $58 on it. Just used it yesterday. I've been BARTing long enough to know how to keep my tickets fresh and magnetized.

He keeps dicking around with it but won't tell me (can't is more like it) why it won't work. My train is pulling in as he's scowling at me. I said "that's my train I need to go! Please write me a day pass!" They do this all the time and just subtract the ride amount from your ticket. His response: "you have to buy a new ticket. This one won't work is giving a strange error." I was furious. I should not have had to buy another ticket, and he made me miss my last train. I'm going to write a complaint. Fucker.

The icing on the cake? When I got to the Embarcadero station where they could help me, I asked her what was wrong with it. Her answer? "De-magnetized" ARGH!

Commuting almost 3 hours a day is stressful and expensive as it is... and these arseholes make 100K a year plus, to do WHAT? Stress me out? :)

Cigarettes vs. tree hugger kids

I am wondering which of her train seat mates is worse. The guy who just smoked a pack-o-cigs or the spoiled tree hugger's kid eating and drinking his breakfast?

where do you put your junk, dude?

Seen in BART station and all over the place...

I do not admire or appreciate skinny dudes in tight skinny jeans. Please stop.

silly Facebook quizzes

I scored a perfect 10 of 10 on the "what liquor bottle is this?". I'm checking in to rehab... after this weekend. I have some partying to do. LOL

You know how when you're hungover and you say "I'm never drinking again"? Well, in all my years of drinking and being hungover, I FINALLY learned something. Now I say "I'm never drinking again. Today."

srsly, bitch? i almost killed you!

So, I'm heading down the escalator to the BART platform. As I was walking I saw a homely woman talking on her cell, rather loudly. She wasn't facing me at this point. As I was walking I heard her say "there are so many fat pigs here." and on and on with comments about how fat and gross and disgusting everyone around her was. Then, I had to walk in front of her. Next comment; "you should see the one that just walked by me. yeah a big fat white woman..." Um, what the hell?! Bitch I'm RIGHT HERE! And all this, coming from a badly dressed, ugly, tore back busted looking bitch? Hey, she wasn't fat though I can give her that. Wow, just WOW.

I'm very glad I'm In Control of my Temper these days... because the thoughts that flashed through my head about what I was going to do or say to her would have landed me in jail. I swear though, as God is my witness... if I ever see her again I may just rip the phone out of her hand and toss it on the 3rd rail.

I love Mexican food, but today no bueno!

Was necessary for that mystery roadside asshole to throw a container of Mexican food in my car and all over me as I drove by?

If I hadn't been on my way to the doctor, I would have stopped my car in the middle of Tennessee Street and beat their ass.

Val likes to call this event the "burrito wig" day.